I see him from time to time, the man I used to be.
He always shows up when there is trouble for me.
He has the darkest circles under his eyes and is always dressed so well,
or, at least better than I am.
He's got that devilish look in his eyes
and a big grin from cheek side to side
and smiles and says 'RELAX, **** all these people
**** everything you can do it on your own your no equal.'
And I look back at him now a days and say 'that thoughts just evil,
how can you keep doing this to people.?'
I can't just consume and consume
cause I'll consume this whole room!
til I'm spread to thin from my bloom
and my gloom balloons and ultimately means my doom.
And I say I'm so new to this
but I know there is truth in this
and I'm feeling better each day because I'm not under hates influence....

I lose him all the time, always, the man I want to become.
for some reason I see us on a life raft in the ocean so vast,
we're holding on huddled together we need each other to grow and stay alive and keep going.
But then for some reason the waves rock us apart and he goes capsizing
while I'm on the raft but I'm barely surviving.
Til I'm washed to shore thinking he's gone forever.
But later on I'll be doing work and he'll walk into a room, dressed in a suit with a suitcase
and I see his face
and my smile lights up the whole place.
Then he says he has been here the whole time,
watching me in quiet
as i struggle through riots
but he says now we can fly but you're going to have to be the pilot
so just try it.
Cause you're now on the right path and if you can handle the task
of traveling together
maybe things will get better.
And hopefully they will.
because if the decisions you'll be making are for seeking thrills
instead of for trying to stay chill
remember, try to stay real.
Try to understand how you feel,
try to see other people and the way that they deal.
Then maybe you can find some of your own truth to reveal...  

I shook him once and I left him forever, the man I was as an addict.
so problematic, I was just oh so tragic.
I tried so hard to get help.
At least, that's how it felt.
But I made false steps and in the end just hurt my self.
So I stood up and learned to run again just to get away.
And I'm happy to say that I think he's had his last day.

I think that he should shine like the sun, the man I am in the present.
Peaceful, calm and pleasant,
with no ill thoughts or resentment.
Be the sun not so that the world revolves around me.
But so the people around me
whoever they be
will have light to see,
understand how they're free.
So I try to flood light into hearts of darkness,
when people fall I'll play harness
and this good will shall be sweet fruit when time to harvest.
Clean dharma,
following laws of karma
and maybe understanding like existentialists.
Were all just part of this nothing and I think I'm getting this.
Our meaningless is meaningful in
what we hold together
so the sun I'm supposed to be can only make things get better.

And so he'll never live in regret, the man I am in moments passed.
He will make memories that last,
whether time goes slow or fast.
He'll be able to say:
"That moment didn't get away,
and if I could do it again
I'd just add some more friends."
On those nights that don't end,
when our good paths won't bend.

So this sun I am at present doesn't mean to sound sappy,
but to everyone who listens I'll say: "JUST BE HAPPY."