4am 4am 4am…. Leftover stonedness Lonely memories I can’t figure out what I miss. Think it’s the calm comfort of tuning out Even though the tuning out slowly murdered me Drift beyond Drift away from everyone I fear people. Sometimes I feel like everyone else disappears in the world Or that they can’t touch me Like I’ve never been touched. I don’t think I’ve ever been touched.
The computer glows and I have to be quiet. My mother is sleeping in the other room. She’s stressed and hurting Guilt notifies me that I haven’t helped her enough.
I don’t know if I feel like dying but I feel like becoming mute. If I can learn to ignore everyone, I can ignore pain and let down expectations Sweetie eyes and a tall lean lover. Dark expression knowing my soul Loving and ******* Soul to soul Skin to skin Breathe with every breath.