Its all coming at me
And i know im not ready
But i still need to accept what i dont deserve
Sometimes i try so hard
But most of the time i just give up
My body finally collapses as my fears drag me down
I dont wanna play this game anymore
Allow me to just accept i lost
I dont wanna get embarrassed anymore
Just allow me to admit it all
I just wanna undo it all
Erase what i have written;
And redo it all
How can i laugh,
If im starting to cry
How can i live,
If im trying to die
If i bleed,
I hope to not stop
If i sleep,
I hope to not wake up
My heart is pounding from all the anxiety
I hope it just stops.
I want my soul to leave me
My questions were never answered
And when i tried to answer myself,
The mirror would always laugh
I was so wrong
I wasnt right
I couldnt speak
But i spoke through the night
Inside my nightmares i would scream;
My dreams were fake
My dreams were never seen
And instead of being on my knees,
I begged on my stomach;
To force myself not to breathe
Make this end
Make it stop
I need air to breathe;
I need a future to see
I cannot chase whats already gone
But when i try to start over, im already done