Ive damaged myself.
Ive abused myself.
& now I walk to a place so I can just drop to the floor.
I just wanna forget everything.
I just wanna close my eyes forever.
Everyday Im drinking *******.
Everyday Im drinking pollution.
Everyday Im drinking poison.
& I cannot stay sober anymore.
Im just drunk on life.
My head is spinning;
& I just continue to be dizzy,
Because Im unable to control myself.
Ive turned so crazy;
Mentally;
Im an invisible alcoholic.
But only Im drunk with problems.
I was sober until I inhaled so much drama.
& now I just cant stop falling over.
Im so confused;
& I dont know where to turn.
Because Im just turning in circles;
& I just end up right back where I started.
How do I stop?
I just want to stop being controlled.
I wanna just be sober again.
But my mind is not letting me throw everything up.
I wanna just spit everything out.
I wanna puke everything up.
Because Im mentally sick inside.
& It got me drunk.
So drunk,
I dont know what Im doing anymore.
So drunk,
I cannot think anymore.
So drunk,
I cannot recognize anymore.
I keep falling.
I keep breaking down.
Im just acting up.
I want everything to just stop.
My body is slowly losing strength;
Because Im so drunk on life.
Im so unfocused,
Im so confused.
My mind suddenly gave up on me;
Because its somewhere else,
While my body is visible.
Ive given up on so much,
& Ive given up on myself.
Because I let the problems take advantage of me.
So tired.
So warn out.
I finally just drop to the floor.
I cannot handle it anymore.
Life has drained me inside;
& filled me with invisible alcohol.
& its too much,
That Im so sick.
But I just cant throw anything up.
Because all the problems are continuously damaging my body inside.
So I finally realized,
That nothing can stop this drama from damaging me.
So forever my body,
Forever my soul,
Forever my nightmares,
Forever I will be..
Wasted.