the door cracked open
light flooded through that small crack
into the dark room

it's been dark for some time now,
years now
there is no way to be deliberate about this
when days take their own form
and harden, refusing to yield

and as an artist
I want to contort things to my own liking
I want to create my own reality
yet for this endeavor the price is high
for my days become full of useless striving
chasing all I think I want
but I'm left bewildered
when I find that everything I've chased all along
Has always been within me

for now I have a ***** in the armor of my heart
but soon my heart will no longer need armor
for it's love will shine forth,
mighty and true
it will be radiant and powerful
that it will no longer need
the injured identity and poorly constructed walls
the armor is comprised of
for the heart in it's authenticity
is the most potent force in all the universe
when we vow to live our lives with integrity
then we have promise ourselves
that we will break free from the rat race--
the endless suffering
of a purposeless life.