Try

I try to remember why I'm alone
I try to forget why I hurt
I try not to walk away
To not beat myself up
And not to care

I try to understand
To hear
And listen
I try not to wince
At the words you say
I try not to cry out
When I'm hit hard

I try to give you everything
Anything I am able
I try to provide
To make you laugh
Make you smile
Make you dinner
Make you ***

I try to be liked
I try to be normal
To be sane
I tried to be attractive
And wanted
Desirable
I try to smiled graciously
And try not to be awkward

I try to find the words
And speak them clearly
To tell you
I try not to hurt myself
To stop the pain
The scraping
Noise and pain
I try to remember love

I try not to hate
Try not to hate your politics
Your religion
Your venom
Scorn and praise
I try to defuse
Before anger
Before escalation

I try to save the spiders
And the memories
The forests
And the whales
I try to hold the world
In my heart
And let sadness
Slip away

I try to anticipate
Whims and needs
See all sides
Your sides
I try to adapt
And overcome
I try to swallow lies
And shine only truth

I try to remember
How I feel in your arms
How you smell and taste
I try to feel
How it changed me
I try not to miss you
So much

I try to do it right
And come from a good place
I try to help those in need
Those less fortunate
With lost hope
I try to be mindful
And present
Kind

I try to keep in touch
To salvage our relationship
And friendships lost
I try to not disparage
Try to speak only well of you
I try to remember the good
And suppress the spite

I try to be forgiving
I try to forgive
To forgive
Forgive
Try
I try with all my might

I try to abide
In my temporary
Suspension of disbelief
I try to keep faith
As evil tides rise
I try
Often I fail
Only to try
To try
And try