I don't know how I can want something
so much that I've never had,
I've never experienced but yet I still want it...
unfathomable would be the word to call it.
I have this feeling that's yearning inside of me.

You know when you can't put your thoughts into words?
but at the same time, you can?
You're just sitting there searching for the correct word
Racking your brain of all the words you know
So, you just settle with the "almost" perfect word
but you know inside that it isn't "the" word you were looking for.

This feeling I can't shake it, it has me in a daze.
A fuzzy cloud of fog that I just can't clear.
I can't bring myself to understand what is deep down inside me.
If I could just get a grasp of it
Then, maybe just maybe I’d be able to pick at it
Understand why, why it feels the way that it does.

Instead it's like I'm running on an endless road
I will never find the ending because it's out of reach
It's something I can't touch
and if only for a minute I think I have a grasp I fall apart...
It happens all over again
I don't know what to call this cycle but
I just wish it would stop.


It's like a solid rock in the middle of my chest
It's strung in my insides hanging on for its dear life
It shreds through my body as its shrieking echo's
bounces inside of me.

Then I find myself here searching for an ending
That I'm too afraid to let happen.
That I'll get all that I want but it'll be a big letdown
Because, it's not everything I thought it would feel like.

I'll have to face my worst fears; the feeling would come back.
It'll creep silently back into my life
I don't know if I can bare the feeling again it's an ache that never goes away.
It's always there.

maybe one day you'll feel the way I do,
it'll drive you nuts until it consumes you.