I get it. Life *****. No, really it does. But... (Come on we all like to see the but(t)s)
It ***** for us ALL.
We have a near constant threat of war/harm no matter where you live.
We have world leaders that don't seem to listen to their full populace but serve their own agenda and the agenda of those who helped keep them in power.
We have inequality of ***, gender, religion, etc etc
Basically if there's a way to make someone see someone else as the dreaded "other" there's strife and discord.
We have humanity waking up to the fact that our own minds have evolved the very same traits that make us feel crazy. Things like ADHD were originally a survival trait for our early ancestors but now drive us mad as we try to learn and pay attention to those we care about. (Yes, I know that was simplistic but it illustrates my point about mental stuff which is NOT the point of this writing so don't argue that with me here please)
We could talk about ways to fix that.
Seriously I love discussions on how to advance humanity in just about ANY regard. Mental health, social growth and development, world politics, etc.
But here... (Yes, I'm finally getting to the point)
Here... I want to talk about personal responsibility.
We have a LOT of **** we can't control. Life is a random chance and fateful hodgepodge of events.
You could be sitting on your couch and be struck by a meteor and killed. You could walk out your door and see someone that changes your world just out walking their dog.
Chance and fate both have a hand on the wheel no matter what you believe. Call them what you will but it is true.
The ONLY thing you CAN control EVERY time is YOUR actions.
Mental health and outside factors and a million other things may limit your actions and options.
BUT!!
YOU ARE STILL RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR ACTIONS.
YES, this includes the words you speak.
YES, this includes the behaviors you do without conscious thought.
YES, this includes each and every action you do small and large.
And you know what... That royally ***** sometimes.
It is so much easier to blame the "other", blame this or that factor. Even the action of NOT taking an action IS an action of which you have responsibility for making.
We all do it. No, seriously... We do.
I do it a LOT lately because I have kids that constantly seem to know just when to do something to derail everything. But that is no excuse. I KNOW what they're like so I SHOULD be planning on them derailing my plans. That's just one tiny example.
I have mental and emotional problems myself. I have partners and friends who do also. I have been hit by random chance and by fate.
Bottom line is that my life is a result of MY choices. Each and every action that I do MAY be in response to actions and factors outside of myself. But I am still responsible for them all. My partners and friends know (at least I hope they do) that I do my best to support and care for them. It may come as natural as breathing to hug them when they're not feeling well or to get upset when it feels like I'm being hurt.
The responsibility for those actions still fall on me. Maybe they don't want hugged because they're overwhelmed and over touched. Maybe they don't know that I've been trying to do something and they didn't recognize my efforts adequately in my opinion for whatever reason.
This is not meaning that they and any "others" are removed of the responsibility for how their actions effect me.
This is not meaning that you should spend all your time thinking and not acting because of fear of the consequences of your actions.
This is not meaning that because someone has what they feel is a valid excuse for their actions that you aren't allowed to be hurt by their actions.
This is NOT meant for reinforcing anyone's (even mine) feelings of everything being their fault.
This IS for reminding myself that while I may not see it all the time... My actions DO have consequences. We're always told things like "this small act of kindness changed the world because it insert famous story here_". I need reminded of THAT.
One of my favorite fictional characters said it best:

“I’m not trying to win. I’m not doing this because I want to beat someone, because I hate someone, or because I want to blame someone. It’s not because it’s fun. God knows it’s not because it’s easy. It’s not even because it works because it hardly ever does. I do what I do because it’s right! Because it’s decent! And above all, it’s kind! It’s just that… Just kind." ... "Hey, you know, maybe there’s no point to any of this at all. But it’s the best I can do. So I’m going to do it. And I’m going to stand here doing it until it kills me." ... "Who I am is where I stand. Where I stand is where I fall.” — The Doctor

I probably can't change the world. I probably can't make a difference that will get me in the history people remember.
But I CAN take control my actions and always strive to be better than I was the day before. I can be kind. I can be a good partner and friend. I can be a good father. I can be a good role model. I CAN make a difference to someone every day. Even if it is nothing more than letting someone cut in in traffic and not honk at them in frustration. Even if it is making a kid smile and calm down to help their parent out in a store. Even if it is helping someone with a couple extra bucks when they're short. Even if it not something that will be remembered 5 minutes after it happened. That doesn't matter. What matters is me controlling my actions. What matters is me reflecting kindness to the world. I may only be one person out of billions.
But maybe it just takes one person, one act, one example to start making a difference for someone else. May be just a pipedream. May be just a fantasy. May be just a way to battle feeling insignificant in this great big world.
But hey... Life *****. I have low days. Sometimes I need a reminder of why I keep trying and putting in the effort even when I struggle. I may not be able to do more than take a tiny nearly insignificant step forward each day... But by thunder that's still moving forward.