Once I had a screaming void a vacancy that overwhelmed the otherness on all sides surrounded by anger’s shoals echoing rage at life’s wrongs a million voices all my own the loneliness was so dark absorbing light into itself reflecting back the counterpart
companionship was thought the balm the fix to all that hurt injustice vanquished in the end the champion was at last found they answered the sirens call sacrificed the best of life this vanity became their stand fighting life on two fronts slaying demons in endless swarms
the inky depths took a wage stealing more than their due while pretending to respond the battle raged as my hero fought embracing a contract none should sign for sanity lost in both of us realizing too late that victory was gained at ruin’s prompt one to save while the other lost
emptiness is now my lot a vacancy without voice nor substance found to stand upon what was a lake is now a line the old gloom shrunk to a point so much less than a void now the blackness has been replaced the silence there reflects life only I exist in aftermath.
The poem “Now My Lot” was inspired by the quote “There used to be a void inside of me, but now there's nothing” written by Tumblr user @winterleapingfrog. The verses speak to the difference between having a void that others can fill and the numbing emptiness that allows nobody inside. The former is terrible. The latter is worse.