I really wish I could better understand myself,
Like be able to reach in, instead of reaching out for help.

I wish my thoughts wouldn't compress on my brain,
Begging to get out, begging to keep me sane.

And I've reluctantly come to notice,
When it comes to life, I'm actually just a novice.

I could pretend to know something about everything,
But in reality, I'm still endeavouring.

To succeed, to achieve,
To figure out what I need.

I struggle in my sea of confusion,
My arms tire as I swim to keep from losing.

How do you know when it’s all done?
When the final fights, fought and the war’s either lost or won.

And you sit there and think of all the things you could've done differently.
“Maybe I could've said something else, or only to a different degree.

The simplest things could change a lot,”
These thoughts always manage to get me distraught.

The mistakes I've made catch me at night,
Where I'm looking for myself, in a room with no light.

It’s hard to say, what I think I'm looking for,
It’s easier to say that I really just don’t know anymore.