Lethargic depressed insane inane speechless crazy alone loved.
still alone searching hiding scared asking hoping walking.  simplistic.
connected living breathing-wishing I wasn't.  Sleeping longing paranoid strange homeless judged.  
stereotypes dependent wishing thinking realism tricks mental functions waves patterns medicine.  
Staying awake.  Crying, screaming, screaming, screaming, angst, anger, understanding yet misunderstood.
apathy
manic precocious processing watching waiting listening-not tasting. day mares.  trains feet cars writing resting regaining energetic.
back down.
up.
down, staying down. staying trying attending pushing achieving descending reading.
surviving. impossible. surviving.