I've thought about it You know Showing my family my poetry But that thought had a bad ending My life is suffocating, painful, and hardly bearable Because of this, the demons inside my head like to make bad matters worse My mind is like a metal box It is just me inside I've learned to position myself in just a way to be party comfy But the second someone else enters, everything I've positioned breaks This isn't to say that I don't let people in, because I do But the people I let into my life are very few In fact Only two One happens to be my older sister She is very wise and has been through a lot in her life So she is the perfect person to talk to The second person happens to be God And I know what some of you may think That he doesn't count as someone to talk to But you're wrong Without him, my life is like a sky with no stars I have no purpose And when I do find a star in the sky Something to work toward It turns out to be an airplane An image of something that will just pass me by But he made the stars that are in the sky The ones I can look up to and believe in something good Maybe he isn't real, I've had those thoughts But to all who don't believe in something Anything Especially if it be God I say this Believing in something gives you purpose when nothing is left When all good has been stripped You can look at what you believe in and hold it close My parents didn't rais me the way they should Even if my mom tried her best So every day has been a battle to keep myself from death With God by my side, the knife against my wrist can't make a single drop of blood spill When my lips are sewn shut, He is the one who can hear my thoughts I'm 'not' trying to make you believe in God I'm just trying to make you believe Because with all this pain and sorrow in the world, What good is living if your not living for something