Will I always want to die early?

A head on collision
Fractured skull with my brain seeping out like oil -black gold
A robber with a gun
Carpet stains forever -the realtor will claim it's wine
A tumor
Cells they're multiplying -a death by creation
Spontaneous combustion
The stench of my body's blackened burning flesh -actually smells pretty tasty
Drowning
Gasping my life's last breath as I scream muted screams and water poetically fills my lungs - shimmering bubbles float to the top

My mother sobbing and cutting herself for months
My father goes insane and shoots himself in the head in my room
My sister cries herself to sleep and wishes she would have seen me more
My best friend doesn't talk for years
My boyfriend throws up at the thought of my death everyday while his parents claim god will make everything okay

Or they'll all write best selling novels on how they survived my awful tragic death

And no one will ever read my poetry


Will I always want to die early?