How can the only friend who has never abandoned you in your life, Abandon you in death. People and friendships was something I thought I didnt care about, but that was because I always had him. But now he is dead and my Pride and strong will to be myself has faded along the way. Be yourself and be kind and friends will surely be made. But what if I dont know who I am and who I am is everything I hate. And kindness turns to sadness and sadness is turning into anger and that scares me. What does it take for me to love myself. What does it take for someone to care. what does it take for someone to stick around and stay alive. What does it take for me to tell the truth when teachers ask how I am doing. I am scared of people knowing, but what does it take until I cant hide it anymore.