Hands folded prayer like to beseech thee
to abduct me with no cause to up braid
natural temptation found commanding
from divine dada disobeyed
Earthbound Olympian of love,

now dwells amidst mossy secluded glade
a natural bed of soft earthy, downy
canopied bridal awaiting to lovers to get laid
and maybe nine months later,

a baby will resemble thee dear milkmaid
then whence we return to Land O’ Lakes chalet
homage will be paid
in which human guise paramour
doles secrets of amorous Lumineers trade
into dreamland such desire does invade.

Victuals to satiate pleasures of flesh
especially erogenous zones
administered by this imaginary mistress
sin seductive tones
thru this private line, but no other phones

triggering mine little rolling stones
to generate primal sounds vis a vis moans
inducing groin seams of pants extreme groans
toward pocket sixty-nine without lovely bones.

A copious amount of adoration
   suffuses entire body of this man
her, whose gentle and kind embrace
   promises to be eternal plan

as made mention in the Bible,
   Quran, or Torah millennia ago rattan
whose healthy libido
   will probably outlive me life span.

Royal carpet treatment awaits
   me each and every day
as differences between myself
   and august dweller on high
establish a bounty and glory
   of compassion to roll in the hay

atop bodacious, delicious,
   felicitous fantasy asks me to lie
imbibing succulent atmosphere
   akin to an eternal month o may
spirit soaring thousands of miles in the sky.

Upon hearing sweet nothings
   nobody else can hear
affecting heavy breathing
   indicated by nostril imperceptibly dust flare
a sheer grin of joy lights up
   countenance ear to ear,

despite the impish quarks
   of this divine being so dear
as journey to inxs of nirvana
   induced ******* whispered clear
from being buck-naked bare.

while ******* hallucination
   at my male member does yank
key mud hood dill,
   where reality doth usually tank

with muss elf feeling *****
sans figurative or real shaft shank
quite the opposite with a wife acidly rank
she frequently pulls my hair as a childish prank

knowing full well that action turns
   my mood sour as a crank
I would escape, but no money
   in the piggy bank.

Other times, her karma
   roars into a tempest with a rage
lashing out like a half-crazed maniac
   loosed upon global stage
on account of silent battles we regularly wage.

I admit my own fair share of peculiar traits
which only to private confidences t'will now relate
keep on the q-t lest spouse doth berate.

Chief among these oddities comprise
lower gastrointestinal perturbations issuing from the ***
which prompt innumerable outbursts of gas
Ranging from quiet puff to a noisy, windy pass.
Page number three.

After usage of toilet with a bowel movement
large enough to sink a sub
wash ****** residue from my behind
with a hose attached to the tub.

This couple resembles Frankenstein
and his bride – argh what a pair
she taunts when i shower,
   clean the rest of my body including hair
dry follicles shaking head back & forth
   side-to-side through the air.

There you now know foibles
   and unusual personal ways
uttering that such antics how she plays
like netted in a one-man fraternity
   undergoing constant haze
pelting this poor soul

   with scraps of food, she flays
until these covered with thick pasty
   gloppy glaze as verboten entrees
Now laugh till you fall over
   and remain in stitches for days.

by: Matthew Ma Ascot Harris
schwenksville, pennsylvania
19473