Depression is Skipping meals because it's easier to be hungry than it is to get myself out of bed
Depression is Sitting on the floor and desperately trying to talk myself into putting socks on... Because putting socks on would require wiggling up the bottom of my skinny jeans, putting the socks on my feet, and then carefully pulling the jeans back over my socks without messing them up (you know the feeling I'm talking about)
Depression is struggling with the socks because I know once that part is over, I'll have to put shoes on- the converse match my outfit. But I've got a wide foot, and I can take converse off without untying them, but I HAVE to untie them to put them back on. So I have to untie these shoes, And the RETIE THEM. It's a lot. It feels like so much. I know it shouldn't. It's putting on shoes.
But wait, there's more!
Once the shoes are on, I've got to pack my book bag, Which first requires taking the stuff out. Once the stuff is out, I have to put that stuff in its place. then I've got to put more stuff in the bag, I have to put the bag on Walk out the door, Eat. Class. Rehearsal. Drive Park Walk to my building Up the stairs in the room.
Take the shoes off Change, Lay in bed
Know that I could've been in bed all day Try to celebrate what little I did Fail.
Toss and turn knowing I should've done more. Fall asleep feeling alone, wondering why I'm never satisfied.
Wake up. Meds. Socks?...- Realize it barely changes
Because
I'm sitting here typing this at 3:53 pm When I should be Putting. My. *******. Socks. On.