Feb 2018
Blue and pinched, blue and finished
My great escape from warm knuckles brushing
And passioned fists clenching
Was drawn up, sketched and written,
A thousand goodbyes swarmed in my lungs.
But the watering whites welled for the first time,
Cracking your marble silence
and spilling consequences left and right.
My plan screeched, I stopped dead in my tracks.
And I thought,
Even if this ******* hurts
I oughta stay and stick this one out.
My great escape from warm knuckles brushing
And passioned fists clenching
Was drawn up, sketched and written,
A thousand goodbyes swarmed in my lungs.
But the watering whites welled for the first time,
Cracking your marble silence
and spilling consequences left and right.
My plan screeched, I stopped dead in my tracks.
And I thought,
Even if this ******* hurts
I oughta stay and stick this one out.
The minute someone causes an emotional reaction in me, I get terrified and afraid and don't understand it and try to trade the bond I've formed for loneliness. It's the easiest method - sure, I miss out in intimacy, but I'm okay on my own. I've done this plenty of times with no consequences.
But when I saw you begin to cry, I knew I was making a grave mistake.
I've never changed plans like this.
Maybe you're something special, maybe there's something changing in me. Maybe it's both.
Even if it hurts to stay by your side, I care about you too much to leave over my unresolved feelings.
February, 2018
But when I saw you begin to cry, I knew I was making a grave mistake.
I've never changed plans like this.
Maybe you're something special, maybe there's something changing in me. Maybe it's both.
Even if it hurts to stay by your side, I care about you too much to leave over my unresolved feelings.
February, 2018
