Creating the perfect scenarios in my mind. It turns out I can race through every bad decision that I ever made. Right down to the kind of shame I felt for lying about love. It breaks me beyond her smiles and kind words. Little pieces are shattered; your blood stained the floor, but the clover grew straight over it and in the spring we make crowns from the flowers. It turns out that I don't simply want to be with you. I simply want to be, but with you. Only you always you. You and I. Bring along bluegrass chiming with every push up the hill. No shoes, no anything, and when I felt the curve of your shoulder it reminded me of river rocks. How we can float out of water, because it's easier to scale boulders than to cross the street. As if when the river runs it breaks the reluctant nature of our bodies and we simply feel fluid. I think the light in your eyes reminded me to open my own. To see, to mainly remember that I can be bright as well. But still I dream of the night like an opportunity that gives you and I someplace to break down walls, and create something like the only afternoon I ever enjoyed a car: it twisted up miles of fairy rings that hid stories and hope. With laughter through the tops of trees, through hillsides, and the place I call home. I want to be so alive that I only feel euphoria with you as my access to the world. Relaxation in your arms like soft touches and a specific catharsis. It's the opposite of reality, now. However, this purpose was to destroy structure. To destroy theΒ Β fear; to leave only possibility. What would you do if you knew? If I could show you that I am the thing which very few believe exist?