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Hinata
Poems
Jan 2018
I hate it
I am filled with a hatred,
A constant stream of negative thoughts drown my head.
I am suffocating under the weight of my loathing,
A river of pain where im floating.
I feel as if I'm cursed,
The happiness and love from others feels rehearsed.
I am a doll of broken dreams,
Empty and falling apart at the seams.
I am hanging by a thread everyday,
Walking a thin rope to avoid all this pain.
I stare into the distance within a shelter of myself,
Never moving as i hide in my shell.
There are good days,
I hate that I'm numb on a very great day.
I'm either numb or in pain,
The happiness comes as frequent as a desert's rain.
Maybe im selfish,
Maybe im just helpless.
I get swallowed in fear when talking to people,
My thoughts dealing hits blow after blow.
I can't tell people that i love my feelings,
They'll just say it's nothing.
I'm suffocating inside myself,
The things I love doing doesn't help.
What's going on with me?
That question is only answered in theories.
If I go,
They'll know.
I can't take the pity,
I don't want their fury.
I hate it!
I hate all this ****!
I hate it
Hate it
Hate
Hate
Hate
Hate...
I hate feeling like this,
I want a way out of this
I want to be free of this hell,
I want to love myself.
Written by
Hinata
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