my brain is splatter painting itself
like I am modern art
and you are sitting there
watching me spin
like a thunderstorm of low serotonin

roaring as I fight a war
within myself that you cannot see

wrestling against quiet demons
of anxious insecurities

Blowing a whispering whirlwind
of "but's" and "not enough's"

Destroying all stability
that might have taken root

And I'm kicking and screaming
but it seems my voice is on mute

help me, help me
and please try to see
that deep underneath
my perfected passive smile,
there's a
thunderstorm of low serotonin
warring to take control of me