Everything has a purpose, a meaning.
Ever little movement has a reason.
I know i understand.
No matter how painful something gets I try to be the best, i want to be the best
The one who never turns their back on you.
But today my dignity and freedom were questioned.
This is something i can not handle, something i will not ignore.
My suffering is justifiable, no blame can be put on anyone or anything.
I deserve what i suffer.
I just need to figure a way to solve it, get ride of it.
Despite everything i still am thankful for what i have even though it may not be enough.
Anger and dissatisfaction is not the answer, but i still can't help but close my room door and cry.
Burry my head in the darkness of my arms and weep,
Sob until it feels as if my flesh is being eaten,
My eyes are turning into fire,
My lungs are fighting for breath.
My heart beats as fast as lighting strikes.
A storm that grows inside me.
I feel shame, i feel doubt i feel trapped.
But i still i do not blame.
The day i do i will lose the ability to fight, to even move.
Everything is in the open now, everything that i tried to hide because of my pride is revealed.
The only good that can come from this is the direction i am getting, the step i have decided to take.