Like a moth to a flame,
I keep coming back to You,
Like a
***** in heat
I lift my tail to your flesh,
I can smell you a mile away ,
on any given day..,
I don't even like you,
Don't
want to do
the things we do....
the hurt you cause me
and the lies you give,,
The promises all broken
like my cheek with ya fist..,
The mistrust
I know so well as you Yell,
while the words you say..,
send me, condemning me to hell,
This is whats given to me yet
still can't seem to let you go,
Let you be
even when you make a fool of me,
Why am I
still here
still around you,
Why am I this way..
holding on to you
Even when i say we're through
It's over I say ..,
Then I cling to you..,
The closer you get
it seems the further you push me away,
I run in opposite directions
trying to fight the traffic
you brought in my life..,
The fist the kicks and slaps  
Broken ribs..,
All coming my way ,
We're scared ,
Afraid to stay or go,
stuck in the middle ,
Running in circles...,
Trying
to get back past lives....,
The word's once said
wasn't truly  give
in ,
To what I let you do to me,
miss use me and bruise me..,
Even when our bodies
Touch I feel  nor felt
no lust
I don't even let you  too close to me ..,
I can't think and can't be who I want to be..
You only gave me part of yourself
put half of you in to this ..,
and now I can't  live with out it,
I had to stop you ,
before
never mind that NOW..,
You're tearing me up even more,
I'm like  
a flower to water  drinking you into me ..,
The potions
you seeping in me
the lies and greed,
just to control me mold me into
what you seek..,
Living for a taste of the freedom
I had before I knew you,
But I don't let you go ,
can't let you leave,
See I got so used to
the way you treat me,
I don't even love you
Nor ever liked you,
The control I give to you
I ask myself who are you ,
who am I
And
why did I let you
take me as you did ..,
control me
with sweet word's
but never
truly giving in to anything.,
Beautiful you said..,
When I know I could do better,
Why do I stay in your presences
When you make me sick..,
Real love don't hurt like this.
But the Pleasure & Pain
Are so meshed to together
That I can't control my feelings
there out of my grasps ,
YET
I'm not revealing  how you upset my life,
I don't like you nor do I want you
This control you got over me ,
I can't believe..,
I let you in to my mind
To find the weakness in me and do all these
things to me,
I know I'm better than what your giving
SO
Why do I take so much from you
all that you do,
What's keeping me here...,
I know its not fear,
For Death
comes to us all and
if it's my time to fall so be it,
let me Fall, God have mercy on me,
for give me for all my transgression
AND I KNOW
MY LIFE LESSONS.
******* ,
You win,
But from what
I been seeing and reading ,
I know know what it is ,
This **** you got me twisted in!
Its a CYCLE
And I'm in
REPEAT
or so you may think..,
The CYCLE of you:
ABUSE!
(To those who have been in it
or going
Thur it;
you can over
come anything -
I did!)
Always me Ayeshah