Ye Olde All-Natural Organic Cleverly-Named Rustic Soap Purveyors, Ltd.

Our licensed soap-istas take dried wasp-****
And whatever stuff the hay-baler missed
And through our hand-made, slow-cold processes
Crank out our pure, adjective-cluttered soaps

Sustainable, certified, organic
we harvest ****** ditch water legally
And extra-****** jimpson weeds (so extra-
****** they’ve never been out on a date)

We’re your natural neighbors; your major
credit card welcome
                                          (but, psssst, it’s just soap)