I wake up every morning i look in the mirror and i hate what i see I put on some makeup feeling like it will make me look pretty. you know, less ugly. I go to my closet and look for the darkest thing to wear. black long sleeve shirt to hide my nasty scars, black leggings or black velvet sweats, before even putting my clothes on i look for my rubber waistbands to hide my disgusting fat cause,,who the **** wants to see that?! i look around the messy room and pick up my bag i shove anything in it notebooks/papers/ my journal then i take a deep breath, i look myself in the mirror in disgust while zipping up my black sweater. on my way to school i think about the worst **** that could happen. "am i gonna get picked on?" "are people gonna **** with me to get a rise out of me" "is today gonna be bad in general?" as i enter the school i see that i'm really late, i sigh and i get my late pass. i put my hood on and keep my earbuds in, i dont want no one to talk to me, i dont want to be greeted. just go the **** away. a simple 'hello' will ruin my day. As i walk to my class i pass all these pretty, flawless girls. i get insecure and i compare myself to them. I think "why the **** am i so ugly?' "why am i so stupid and have really **** grades?" Through out the whole day i dont do my work, i sit in a desk, i look at the floor, or the door then up at the clock. "can this day go by any faster?" When school is over i run out the doors, not wanting to stop to say hi to anyone, i just leave, when i arrive at my house i quickly run up the stairs and rush in, i drop my bag, go to my room, and boom. i jump and hide under the covers thanking god the day for me is over then i drift to sleep hoping i don't wake up.