“State your full name for the record.”
       Already guilty before the impartial audience
“Please raise your right hand…”
       Do the hokey pokey, turn the truth around
“Remember, you are under oath.”
       For doing what was right, you’ll be punished to the end
“May the record reflect…”
       …That we couldn’t break this one.
“Call the next witness.”
       Since this one’s honesty bores us
“You are excused.”
       Oh how I wish that were true.