Its hotter than it oughta be
Craving, wishing for something autumnal
I kick it up the city pavement
Sweat formulating on every inch of my face
Toss and turn at night
Asking myself those impossible questions
Wondering what I'm doing
And why I'm here.

My heart releases pain
When I think about others putting a ring on it all
I guess I just thought I'd have it all figured out by now
As a chorus of city career women and I sing
It ain't no simple thing.

I know in one click
I could line up a flurry of dates
But I just feel nothing
And don't have the capacity to play games.

I don't look forward to things the way I used to
I suppose its growing older
Growing older.

I saw you in my bed
And by my side
And just felt the corners of my mouth turn downward
Knowing I was revisiting corpses.

And thats okay
I pontificate on rules and regulations
I'm tired of being my own leader all the time
So I'm gonna throw my hands up in the air a little more.

You say I'm so powerful
You say you know I'm gonna be so powerful
You say I'm so power
Ful.

The sun it blazes from my window
As I hop skip away from my own rumination
I'm my best executioner.

I ponder the things I could cut out
In order to avoid some more negativity
Contemplate escape routes
Imagine nightmares.

Its almost my birthday.