It’s a Monday morning and I’ve awoken with this grog
what is this horrific feeling starring at me through the fog
Oh ****. I sigh with a cough and a weeze
It’s the flu I’ve heard so much about
Why’s it always me!

I’ll pop the Sudafed I left in the drawer from this time a year ago
that’ll teach this viral ******* whats for
I remember everyone drifted very far, Declared me the patient
Proclaimed I had man flu and was being over dramatic
OH THE PAIN i cried, FOR THOU DOES NOT KNOW!

Why wont you get out of my head
I honestly feel id be better off dead
this mucus and sinus inflamation will allow no silence
to the pounding that exists in the echoing arena of my head

Right ok, Its 8:15 time to lift the dog and bone
And shockingly I sound the picture of health to the boss on the phone
Sick again they sigh as my sinus’ explode
im sorry boss I’ve got to go, My head is pounding and my nose needs blown

Time to go back to bed
Sleep is what I need
Become a marshmallow in the blanket
and try to remember how to breath
I’ll lie on one side as my nostril feels like it fills
i hate being ******* sick. Where’d I put my pills?
I stare at the ceiling while the realisation kicks in
I left them in the kitchen, my moody temper is thrilled

I sound 80 years my senior as I curse the steps below
Hanging on the hand rail, like a Sherpa who’s promised to get me home
I should have gotten a stair lift, My arms are dragging like lead
Why is that phone ringing, If it’s work tell'em im dead

Call it man flu
Call it a cold
It doesn’t stop me feeling old
Its dramatic I know
and my tone is dire
Guess I’ll just feel sorry for myself and go drink lemsip by the fire