Days like this I just need to step back.
Realize that life *****.
And I better get over it soon.
Life ***** and is beautiful at the very same time.
I want the lessons I learned today to last forever,
But I want this day to end.
I want all the wounds of the past to close back up.
I want to stop reminiscing.
Reminiscing on being oblivious.
Reminiscing on the hate going on around me.
Reminiscing on the hate I was creating for myself.
But is it really reminiscing if it’s still there?

But I mean, I’m just like the others.
I’m just taking my time.
Going slowly. Passively.
Give myself chances to jump out of the pool that I will someday drown in.
Because you see, in a pool, you can get out.
But when you jump off an airplane into the middle of the ocean,
You’re stuck.
And I know I’m scared of the ocean,
But aren’t we meant to be daring?
I'm scared one day I’ll lose it.
And the pool will start transforming into an ocean, and I’ll let it.
I’ll stop swimming so close to the edge.
But until then, I’ll keep tiptoeing on the bottom.