for three days i was your muse,
for three months i was the apple of your eye
and as long as the snow fell
you were on my mind

why do i still want to make you proud?
what did you see in me?
what did i see in you?
this is my mystery
because now you are lost to me

so long gone i still seek approval,
still sing your songs,
still defined by our legacy,
i've found i can't escape that of which i'm cast
we were never meant to last

rain-dappled asphalt and bones
bleached by midwinter sunlight,
the silent way in which snow met snow
the deafening way in which your breath
used to meet my skin

i need to let go
i need to
make you proud