when alone in thought
my mind wonders to a familiar thought
a fantasy created to boost the self
there i am the ******
strong
phenomenal
witty
beautifull
courages
supported
like­d and loved
respected
a leader
a mother
a wife
a daughter in law
everything in real i will never be and have
my empty reality
brakes me to the core
with great difficulty and emphasis , i smile
to convince myself and others i am truly happy
people look at me and see blessings
i wish i could look at myself
at least
and smile
it is okay, i got you
my own voice echos in my ears
my own voice has to be my strenght
why did God decide to give me a lonely path
a lonely life
a lonely mountain
the cold, the silence, the ache in my soul
it is slowly consuming me until nothing is left
nothing except these words
they speak of a battle once fought for the light
a battle lost to despair
these word is all i have