Today I didn't eat.
Yesterday I didn't sleep.
And tomorrow I don't think I'll shower.
But maybe the day after that I'll be myself again. Maybe I'll make a list of all the things I need to do. Call my mom. Wash my sheets. Read a book. But maybe the list will just lie beside me in bed and laugh and laugh and laugh when I can't even raise my head off the pillow.
Today I didn't eat.
But today I did drink.
I drank two bottles of beer and the salty tears that dripped down my face and landed into my mouth.
Yesterday I didn't sleep.
But yesterday I did dream.
I dreamt of a world where depression doesn't exist and where thoughts cannot be evil and where the worst self harm you could do is clipping your nails just a little too short.
Tomorrow I don't think I'll shower.
But tomorrow I will think about dying. And I will think about a life better than the one I'm living. And I will think about what my mom would do if she couldn't hold her baby anymore. And I will think about what the people at school would say. And I will think about who would come to my funeral. And I will think about if anyone's life's would even ******* change at all.
But today and didn't eat.
And yesterday I didn't sleep.
And tomorrow...