well... i have one solution...
can taking a ****
be deemed as an addiction?
only on laxatives...
so i pull one off while
taking a ****...
   i'd only feel guilty
about doing it
if i didn't actually take
a ****...
   i'm probably one
of the last men to buy
a ***** mag,
face to face with someone
in a shop...
****! belgium newsagents
were so cool about it,
there was nothing
about english puritanical
about it...
          so...
you'd rather ******* to
  watching cow dangles?
i'm wearing health orientated
testosterone spectacles...
insert the mongolian
idiot harmonica...
    i take a **** and do it
and i'm beating
     the "king of kings",
while sitting on:
the throne of thrones.
    it's no biggie,
no bagpipe either...
mind you, i mind ease out a ****
that sounds like
the pict instrument...
   but i must be one
of the last lads...
buying a ***** mag,
under-age in a newsagent...
i guess i had the ***** before
the trojan horse virus
stopped attacking
***** sites...
lucky me, i get to don
the rose cheeks of "shame",
thank **** i was under-age
when buying these mags...
the youth end of the
bell-curve of a certain generational
gap...
          what?
***** don't give, dog don't take.
do one on the *******,
and you'll be like:
do i really need to do one
with scented candles and a
comfortable chair?
                    do i need
an aura of ambitious
pretenses?
           do your no. 1,
then do your no. 2,
   and then do your no. 3...
   it's not a jig-saw puzzle,
in all honesty...
       wash your hands twice...
i find it the most perfect
3-in-1 combo-rambo...
      having a tennis partner is
already like doing no. 1 and a
no. 2...
      what's the problem?