I've never wanted to be the celebrant of anything.
Because I've never felt comfortable socializing.

But if I do celebrate, it would be a small one, and with family.
Also, of course, those few people who are special to me.

And I don't like the attention given to the debutant,
All eyes on her, all expectant.

And I also think that it would be a waste of money;
When I could just buy books or a new ukelele.

And I don't want people to be obliged to get me things,
Just because I've put their names on lists with 18s.

And I don't want to get disappointed,
If they don't show up as expected.

And I think it's unfair for the substitute-whatever and they can't do anything about it but be okay
With how they were only noticed when someone else is away.

I don't want to have to beg my mom to cross out my ex-lovers
From the list of my 18 Roses partners.

I don't like the thought of having to hire a photographer,
When I could just ask my uncle or my mother.

Neither would I need or want a videographer,
I've had enough of it with my boyfriend of a vlogger.

I don't want to have to talk to old friends,
When I've clearly buried them all in the past.

I don't want to be obliged to invite classmates whom I've never been close to;
I don't want them to be obliged to come too.

I don't like having to think that maybe the only reason you want me to also do this,
Was because you wanted to find where your satisfaction is.

And if I do this, I don't want to see you in the crowd,
Your thoughts of negativity bubbling up in a cloud.

And lastly, I don't want to be like you,
I don't want to end up unsatisfied too.