i have this theory... concerning paedophiles...
i find these individuals to have absolutely no
interest in drinking, smoking cigarettes,
or the slightest care for culinary expeditions;
plus, they're not gay enough
to like duran duran...

i had one gay flatmate at uni
who thought i was an
oddity liking duran duran...
second stance? a-ha...
his type? manic street preachers...
come on... it's the same roulette
stemming from the 60s:
the beatles vs. the stones
the cure vs. depeche mode
duran duran vs. a-ha...
   nirvana vs. pearl jam
black sabbath vs. led zeppelin...

isabella wasn't complaining, well, she was,
she bothered me asking
why i had a picture of napoleon
stuck to my wall...
      (em... the duchy of warsaw?
the prior non-existence of
                                        a polish state?)

   evidently: marquis de sade didn't bother her...
was seperated the two? ah, plato...
**** me, being 18 you get up
to quirky *******... like staying up all night
just to walk up arthur's seat
and then buy milk & cornflakes
at 5 a.m. in a supermarket...
and the scot's fresh, air, but that's me,
i still think that paedophiles
have absolutely no interest in food,
drinking, or smoking...
     imagine the english etiquette
learned...
in a park, on a bench...
and some ****** walks up to you
and sits down...
the english etiquette?
   just ask if he's allowed to sit
on the bench with you... the ****** doesn't...
                   what do you do?
the same thing you'd do with
a rag while cooking beef
    in a kitchen and the circling
crazy fest of a fly, you light a cigarette...
what happens after?
   the ****** starts coughing...
and later abandons his perch...
    it's oh so terribly english
to state
(a) i'm so sorry
   and
         (b) may i?
                       that's the english etiquette,
if you're english and don't
know these two article
of decency, then you're basically
leaving your flood-gates
wide open, given enough status
for people to covertly
practice your ethinicity...
          and that's how subversion
happens, but without a figurehead,
well... subversion en masse...
when in england
never assume you're excused from
saying "sorry" when the etiquette
states you have to, even on
apathetic grounding for the most
minor offence...
       and when asking to share a park
bench with a stranger,
even if the stranger is wearing
headphones...
provide the etiquette question
of: may i?
otherwise? people might take you
for a kiddy-fiddler...
                     esp. when the stranger
next to you lights a ciagarette and is
drinking beer...
             and you don't have the *****
or right to recompense the etiquette of:
can you please not smoke /
may i sit with you on the same bench?
   glued to an irk -
                       ****** didn't
ask to sit with me,
   i wasn't going to ask him if he'd mind
me smoking...
unlike with that old world gent
  who walked his raleigh bike -
and asked me if i wouldn't mind sharing
a bench with me...
           took us an hour to stop talking...
but mind you, i also asked whether
he didn't mind me smoking a cigarette
and drinking a beer...
       i can't believe it,
         even though i wasn't born here,
i know more about the english than the english
know about themselves;
i guess... that's because i sorta love them.