Here’s the thing:
I am okay because I’ve learned how to distort the pieces of us, the pieces of our story
I forcibly separate the past from our current reality
The you I know now isn’t the you I used to know
The feelings I felt for you, the words you spoke that filled me with an irreplaceable notion of happiness, are all distant memories
They have no place in our present

Even though I see you now, even when we’re sharing the same space, same bed, same air
I miss you
Because the you that I fell deeply in love with
On a bench alongside the garden of roses beside the lake
Alone on a balcony in Paris
By your side on the dock, underneath the blanket of stars that allowed us to fool ourselves, fall for the facade that we were possible
Isn’t the person you are to me now

You are unreachably distant
I think you’re choosing to be different
To help me, to make it easier on you, who knows
You won’t let me in, and I don’t know if it’s because you’re afraid of what that will mean for you, or what that will mean for me
Perhaps it’s a little bit of both

You could be simply a victim of your own immensely busy life, choosing to rarely classify me as a priority
Or maybe you’ve decided that we’ve been reckless, careless, stupid, one too many times

But I don’t know how to be anything aside from that
One word from you, one glance my way
And I realize that denying that, denying you, would be turning down an irrepressible part of myself
A part of me I will never be able to ignore -
because it’s the part that will always belong to you