it would've hurt less
if it took me by surprise
but i've always been keen,
my eyes catching and
my hearts sinking on
every signs that told me
that you'll soon leave

it would've hurt more
if i didn't expect it
and so i've been bracing myself
my chin high and
my lips tight as I've watched
with excruciating pain for
the moment that confirms
my antagonizing thoughts

and i think what hurts me
the most wasn't me being right
but the lingering hope
that you would prove me wrong