i was a chubby kid, sure...
                                      when i moved to england,
i was guzzling down cans of coca-cola
                                  like mad...
                                            back in poland?
climbing trees,
        playing hide & seek,
   going to bonfires where we
threw potatoes into the fire
and later ate them, smoked,
        covered in ash.
     and ****, i did work out from
the age of 18 to the age of 21...
gym, squash, cyciling in a frenzy
on the narrow country-roads
of essex...
   i might have had a six-pack...
at the zenith i weighed in at under
80kg...
                     i managed to
dig out the sort of underwear
i used to wear a few days ago...
   and started thinking: is this a
handerchief, or a napkin?
       do i put this on my hand,
or on my head?
         at 115kg...
    the exercise i get up to today?
  no, nope, no treadmill, now rowing machine...
no gym in general...
      a litre of *** every night...
i can't and even won't begin
to apologiße... can't be bothered...
    what i will apologiße about is:
on the odd day, i might prefer
    monster magnet's version of donovan's
song three king fishers...
          just for the oomph of guitars!
              oh ****, the sitar is still there.
i remember talking about this
with my drug dealer over a joint once...
****... what was his name?
              massive afro, a lenny kravitz
look-alike...
                 great smoking session,
obviously i was not on a parallel with him,
given the snorting sound...
   what? *******...
       amphetamines are for poor kids,
or luftwaffe... or isis...
                 the drug is an all army...
    i once talked to an ex-convict,
       turned dub-step d.j.,
          his main complaint from being addicted
to amphetamine? insomnia...
     well... d'uh... that's what the luftwaffe
had to experience, to give rise of
the london blitz: being wide-awake,
         setting off from an airport in berlin.
the thing is... i don't remember having
a body being under 80 kilograms,
    or something resembling a six-pack...
    i have no idea as to why that's the case,
it's like i was drunk for 3 years, and
drank too much, and on a chance
of "nostalgia"... i can only remember clipping
my toenails.
             i'm more orientated these days...
i either have a goatee, or a beard,
   or a double-chin...
              **** me, exercise is great...
a litre of *** per night?
                     it's not exactly a six-pack...
but something of a balloon parameter...
     a sheep-stomach...
              to be honest, with regard to this
being a very narcissitic piece?
                i find creating fictional characters
too difficult...
      i don't like creating shields for myself...
i'm stressing the genesis story
  of stripping all my clothes & masks off;
well, if poetry doesn't tread or raise itself
to the dizzy heights of biblical "metaphor" -
then obviously the biblical,
   could never become contemporary,
the translation is temporal...
   in poetic "anti-scientific" terms: it too evolves;
how can there not be an evolutionary
undercurrent of a book, that has established
institutions like the vatican, the church?
              john milton knew it was
an evolutionary text, like the darwinists stated
that the ape body was also an evolutionary canvas...
    for some reason, coming from the east,
i feel implored to avoid the cliché standard
of working on the book of genesis...
                 i feel a need to be immersed in
the book of exodus... once the jews began
congregating in israel,
           the poles started dispersing -
               *dzięki leszek, leszek **** wojensa...
                     no, i oraz: król zefa-wółtyłka.