When we got down, you were there.
Smiles faded, laughter dropped
As you sang by the edge
I've never felt so powerless.
I was disgusted by myself, I couldn't look at you.
You were ready to die.

And so I thought of her. Of your common experience.
This twisted drive within you.
How didn't I see hers?
Play acting is uncomfortable,
But you left without.

"That day was yours already"
That's all I could think,
twisting parts of memory
and conversations I didn't link.

At the start you had resource
and the lightest days were electric.
Complete faith in your smiling course
Proud of the path you picked.

You had the devotion of one,
But the cell of a darker God,
and when he came to block out the sun,
Your dizzy mind forgot.

Mental shadow,
Eternal, lifeless doubt.
How could you.
How could you.