after you drink, enough as i have, you get the strangest
recipes enter your mind...
               and you're not as lazy a marijuana smoker
either... you really start imagining things,
that aren't, or shouldn't be there, but later materialise,
and are actually there.
                  like tonight,
                  **** me... getting drunk can really give
you the munchies...
                i was like: it can't be as simple as crisps
from a packet... it can't be ready made, there,
at an arm's reach... so it began:
                                              bacon,
     ­             cherry tomatoes...
                           garlic paste...
                 crème fraîche!  
                       parsley to garnish!
                             pickled chilies!
            turmeric!
                     kashmiri chili powder!
            processed cheese! (laughing cow type)...
           i swear i missed something...
   oh yeah...  brassica juncea - or mustard greens,
   something a bit like lettuce...
     but if packaged, also includes red cabbage snippets...
plus arugula (eruca sativa), also a plant / rocket...
         and the carbohydrate canvas to serve it on?
                                                         a tortilla!
i swear, i should either stop drinking,
or stop drinking up recipes, when drunk...
  either that, or what i'm tasting, when drunk,
tastes really good, or that... well... if someone sober
would dare to eat what i conjure up drunk, would simply puke...
don't know, i conjure this recipe out of my ***
and it stays down... it's not like i'm frying a dog's ****
all of a sudden...
           if it stays down, and you get to digest it?
it can only be as bad as it sounds, with you not having
****** around with the stated ingredients, to whatever palette
of proportion that your palette's suited to entertain.
    don't know, i swear no marijuana smoker would
go as far as to invent something like this...
            you drink... you do get hungry...
                                     and then you experiment,
for some ****** reason that no one seems to be able to explain.
i get right into cooking something up,
      primarily because when doing chemistry
at university, the most enjoyable chapter was organic chemistry...
and that was like cooking...
i can't say i'm boasting... i don't know if a sober person
would find this recipe appealing...
            but having made it drunk, i'm pretty sure
another drunk would eat it and conclude the same as i:
****** genius... never take me to a kebab takeway... ever again!
                    oh gee me...                             clap clap.
by now i might as well insinuate that i'm faking
  sniffing lines of ******* by the buzz of positivity i'm feeling.