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Apr 2017
you are 12 when your sister first explains what happens between older boys and girls
she tells you not to think about it too much yet
you are years from understanding

you are 13 and you are having your first boyfriend over
your mother tells you not to kiss him yet because you are too young
because boys like girls that respect themselves
you sit in the living room next to him but not too close
your thighs are three inches of innocence away from one another
you keep that distance

you are 14 and you have your first high school boyfriend
your mom and dad sit you down for the talk
they remind you to respect yourself
they tell you how important it is to save yourself for someone that really matters
you remember boys like girls that respect themselves

you are 15 and virginities are dropping like flies all around you
boys don't like girls that sleep around
he tells you he loves you and you believe him
so you sleep with one boy

you are 16 and you fall in love hard
your stomach turns at the thought of confessing you did not save yourself for him
its okay
hes on number 10

you are 17 and past buzzed
its the first party of the summer
the boy you have had your eyes on since the beginning of the night
charms you underneath his arm
he leads you to his truck as you giggle
the alcohol and the excitement are tempting
you pull your hand away and head back to the party
save yourself for someone who matters

you are 18 and this is your second boyfriend in two months
your mother warns you to be careful
she says one day your husband will ask you your number
and you don't want to be embarrassed by that
you keep your number low and your head high

you are 19 and hookups out number first dates
you are 19 when you wonder
why you ever respected yourself
when no one else did the same
you are 19 when sleeping around seems less embarrassing
than respecting yourself for a boy who never did the same
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