Sometimes I stay awake and I try to find the words to tell you how I really feel.
And sometimes when I try to say them, it all comes out wrong.
It's kinda like having a thought in your head.
You have it, then you lose it on the tip of your tongue and stumble over the words, feeling like the world's biggest fool.
And tonight I feel like nothing is making sense right now.
I can't place why I ever stopped looking for them when the answers were staring me in the face.
You try and be a stronger person, trying to protect yourself  from a mother who can't stop drinking and popping pills and smoking whatever she could get her hands on.
You try and be the best daughter your parents could ask for.
You try and work double shifts, doing things that nobody ever asked you to do.
Try and work yourself till you can't breathe, smell or hear almost anything.
You know what's funny?
Having a mom who tells you she's sorry, that she'll try harder and then time and time again screws you over with every lie.
You put on a brave face and act like nothing ever happened between you and her.
You try to maintain that mask, and then, when nobody sees, try holding back the tears and pent up emotion that's been in store.
I dare you to try doing that and then maybe you will see how hard I really tried to be strong.
But everybody thought I couldn't be fazed by anything, that I was fine, all the time.
But I'm not as bulletproof as you think; I'm just human and sometimes I break when I fall down.
I, the unbreakable girl, broke; behind walls that were already down, outside of a mask that I forgot to wear.
So, not everything is good as you think it to be.
But every day, I get a little bit stronger.
Every day, I get a little bit stronger.