You say I played games with your heart…
that I took all we were for granted.
But trust me (if you can)
I never saw any of this as a game.

It hurts me to think that
you don’t think I tried hard enough.
Oh, please understand that I tried.
I gave you every inch of me
Every hidden corner,
Every sharp edge,
Every soft curve.
I gave you my whole universe,
And in doing so, I stopped expanding.
I stopped growing into myself so I could only grow toward you -
My sun.

I never saw you as a toy.
You were my greatest weakness,
My best friend,
And my world.
The day I decided I needed to grow for myself, the universe of our love was swallowed up in its entirety.

I hope you understand,
I gave you all of me, maybe too much of me --
In loving you, I lost who I was.
Maybe it’s time we both start expecting better,
Me for myself,
And you for your love.

This was never a game to me.
But, if it was a game,
and the prize was our love,
we both lost.

But, maybe we will understand why we had to lose this,
And maybe one day we’ll be fine.

(a.g.)