It's smells and feels like
My old coffee shop days
When I fell into the vat of
I'm so new.

And it's like every little thing
Makes me tremble or shudder
I take everything so personally.

My hair is faded coral
I try to love this version of me
Everything is hide tide ridden
Stressful
And my face swells up
With tears
When I think of how much
I miss my mama and papa in  Alabama.

I miss how I use to be
Because I'm a gluten for nostalgia
I'm the recepient of constant
Expectation
Backlash
And everyone chalks it up as
You are just too much woman.

I reached out to him
The one who tread on my heart
Like it was wilting lumber
We had a kind and cinematically emotional conversation
Filled to the rim with toys r us.

God forbid we trend on the internet
I'm crying in a coffee shop now
Just ever so slightly
Because Chicago is a constant purr and whirlwind
And I'm just trying to
Do nothing
But kick ***
And Love.