I lash out for the sake of noise
Silence is my enemy
I use my fake happiness as a ploy so others don't think they get to me
My advantage is that I never win so people assume they are ahead of me
I've already come this far so finishing seems like the right thing
But my stubbornness usually gets the best of me
I stare into the abyss and try to forget the casualties
In this life I'm finding out that I'm my greatest tragedy
So right or wrong I'm in this with no apologies
You can keep your love, I'm on my own
You're no longer a priority
My heart is back in my chest but still lacks authority
It forgets to beat, I forget to breathe but that's a different story
So time traveling and planes crashing are all that's left of me
Save your trap doors and vacant holes
I know what's best for me
I sway in and out of good and bad questioning my reality
If we all come from stardust then an afterlife is nothing but make believe
When she comes to me in my dreams I have to believe it's meant to be
Because she was always my anchor out at sea
I draw blood for the sake of feeling
Then go to church for some honest healing
And who knows maybe it will keep my heart from reeling
But these days I just look for any sign of smoke through my glass pipe
I can't help but be weak but I still fight
It took me months to write this but I think it's alright