when the spoon bangs up against my teeth i feel it reverberate through me, like my frequent spasms that wrack my entire body. it goes down hard. i am hacking up pulmonary blood and half-digested puzzle pieces in yet another failed attempt to **** my system. it feels like 1,000 needles trying to enter a single spot on my skin.

apoptosis; programmed cell death. it's a poor god that can't save everyone. when i press my eyes i see colors, and shapes, and stars that slam into me like a tractor trailer. my thoracic cavity caves underfoot. i bruise like a peach. i'm like a peach in a lot of ways, actually. don't ask me how. that's disgusting.