your voice frantic in voicemail lit up my night like mortar fire
i hurdled headfirst, crashed outward and over, chased by fear and following desire
broke through my door and stepped into the stars
filled with panicked concern and without a thought ignoring my scars  
frigid fingers shaking with shock at hearing your voice
not a thought, not a question, not a choice
just did it
"find her number, **** it where is it"
"she's not on speed dial - new phone"

finally found it - still first in my contacts
your name embroidered at the edges with ASCII smiles  
(:Abs:)
catch in my chest, my worry spreading like cancer
dialed your number, but there was no answer