sobriety is fleeting, a bird that flies in and out of my life
sometimes it lingers, but most of the time it only stops to say hello
much like the drinking, snorting, dropping, tripping, that calls to me
and for so long now i've been on this path
the one that everyone seems to see as righteousness
and yes, i'm doing right, i can see that with my own eyes,
but does happiness linger? no more than usual
and have i lost the urges that call to me, deep, dark, and loud in the night? no
they are louder than ever and i am compromised
because i am human
and as long as i have this heart beating within me
as long as the blood beneath the surface calls
to have some kind of cocktail poured directly into it
so that the brain within my skull can escape, or travel, or trip,
whatever the ******* want to call it,
i will always want for something
i will always itch
i will always ask for just one more
i will always desire escape
and i will always grant my wish to disappear
even if the moments are only fleeting, like a bird come to say hello