I have this song on repeat hoping that if I listen to the words enough times the sting that each syllable has would be less apparent. Instead I'm find myself laying in a bed of nails, wishing I could rewind and go back and say sorry over and over until my throat cracked and bled. Even then id wheeze the words because the words need to be bled. I can't escape this quiet little storm and I'm stuck on the eye wishing I never said goodbye in the first place. I convinced myself that I was poison and you had taken me and I was afraid of watching the beautiful pettles in my hand brown and decay. I guess I'll never find the true reason I had to walk away. I tried to say "I love you" but all that came out was "goodbye" my eyes widened because it felt as if a ghost stabbed my throat with the word. I sat for too long in the darkness of my room contemplating whether it was my selfish attitude or my fear of never being good enough for you. I stopped counting the days after I stopped feeling and the numbness pumped into my body and I got addicted. Every new girl just fed the addiction because id feel nothing when it wasn't you. It doesn't matter how much alcohol I'd poured directly onto my lungs I could never drown the memory of you. I hate this, I hate myself. Why did I say goodbye. I spend my time punching mirrors hoping the broken shards will cut deep enough to bleed out all this emptiness

But now I'm staring into beautiful hazel eyes, not a single thought forming in my head. My heart screaming words and my body flushes with feelings I haven't felt in months, maybe years. I can't believe it took so long to realize that those eyes are the only things keeping me grounded. Whenever I'd go to sleep I could feel your breath on my neck and I'd wake up with a wet pillow. But that doesn't matter anymore because I have you. I have you in my arms and I'm never letting go. I'm happy, I'm feeling, I love you and I'm never letting go. I will still scream I'm sorry into the bathroom mirror hoping my reflection will Crack because I know I don't deserve a second chance. I know I deserve you and you deserve to be happy so I will work hard to make you strong and protect you. I can't believe I forgot what love like this felt like, but I guess no one else can love me like this but you. I could never bleed enough thank yous for letting me crawl back into your life, you're the only thing that occupies the space in my head. I love you more than it could ever be said. I'm never giving up and I promise I will grind down my bones and tear my flesh apart before I ever say goodbye again. I love you. I'll say it over and over. Every time I say I love you while looking into your eyes it feels like a crack in my heart seals back together. Everytime I see you in feel a slice in my lungs close back up. You're my everything and I'd give up anything to keep you for the rest of this life and the next