8 years ago my dad died
And today I still sit here and ask myself why
What did I do to deserve this punishment
Who took hold of my life, and filled it with excrement?
6 months later almost passed away
Diagnosed with diabetes, learned how to deal with it each day
Now its pushing me down, leaving me feeling gray
And I'm hurting inside, but I'll just hide it anyways
Yeah I never learned the way others really did
Guess growing up without a father ain't no way for a kid
Now I'm stuck inside a hole feeling like I've done wrong
And my only simple solace is the words in this song
Because the sweat on my back doesn't mean that its over
And this pain that I carry is the burden on my shoulders
I ain't talking about quitting or just keeling over
Because I'm fighting with my all, I'm an emotional soldier.
8 years later and not much has changed
11 visits to the hospital and I'm the one to blame
Blood draws every other hour, and an insulin drip
thinking to myself, why am I still in this ****?
3 years in and my depression is crippling
Hours spent self loathing, when I should have been healing
Now I'm sitting in bed, listenin' to myself talk
And my head is hung low, buried inside my thoughts
Because the sweat on my back doesn't mean that its over
And this pain that I carry is the burden on my shoulders
I ain't talking about quitting or just keeling over
Because I'm fighting with my all, I'm an emotional soldier
Almost 20 years old, still naïve in my youth,
Can't deal with my pain, refuse to swallow the truth
Yeah I'm pushing and fighting with all of my might
But its hard to deal with dark, when you're searchin' for the light.