"Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans."
-John Lennon

But when you're at the prime of your youth you can't live but you're not sad enough to die...yet.
We are told to "be free, live as if it is the day of your death!"
But what is it to "live" to "be free"?
Because we're never really free are we? We just convince ourselves that we are so we don't mope around all the time.
We think that living is when your heart is beating and your lungs are breathing.
I disagree.

The rush and adrenaline of sitting on the train tracks while a train comes charging at you, unable to stop. That is living.
And if I should die by the force of a train, I will become free.
No more worrying, no more planning other things. That's when I start to live. I'm not living but I live.

Perhaps our life begins after its over because when it ends we already know the beginning and all the morbidity in the middle. Well, the ending isn't much of a surprise we all know that one God ****** forsaken day, you'll suddenly feel cold and weak so you decide to have a little sleep but you never wake up.
No one ever wakes up, so then you're stuck in this dream where no rules apply.

You are free. You can live.
Heaven is only what we make it to be as it lives in us, in our heads, we don't go anywhere it comes to us.